Gray Hairs and Wood Chippers

My 6-year old daughter is a constant crack-up to dear old dad. While the rest of my family was busy picking out thoughtful cards and clip-on bow ties this past Father’s Day, Kaylee thought long and hard about it and got Pops something he could really use…a Sharper Image Nose and Ear Hair Trimmer. Yeah, she’s something alright.

Well, after she noticed that dad hadn’t been trimming said errant hairs, she suggested that she be the first to give ‘em a whack. After all, she had purchased it with her own hard earned cash. And who was I to argue with that kind of logic?

First she gently inserted the trimmer in one furry ear, and then the next. I noticed right off that when the trimmer grabs hold of an especially thick gray one, the ensuing sound is remarkably similar to that of a wet tree limb being fed into a wood chipper. Throughout the ordeal the little gem strained a bit and lost more than a few rpm’s, but over all it seemed to survive the adventure relatively unscathed.

Moving on to the rainforest that is my nostrils, my curly little bundle of joy (my daughter, not the trimmer) squealed with glee at every follicle ripping change of pitch emitted by the little whirring wonder. Yep, she’s a chip off the old block, that’s for sure.

So here I sit at the keyboard, freshly trimmed, hearing clear as a bell, and breathing through fully manicured, unrestricted pipes. My thoughtful little daughter is happy, I'm happy because she's happy, and all is good with the world. I can hardly wait to see what she comes up with next.

Captain Hairless <><